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  #1  
Old 09-16-2004, 10:29 PM
Sharron Sharron is offline
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Default I'm sending out an S.O.S

Hi Dr. Joe,
I woke this morning telling myself this was going to be the day I would make a positive change in my life. It didn't take long, however, for me to slip right back into my "slump". Suicidal thoughts are nothing new for me, i have made weak attempts but never taking it to the point where i needed medical attention. Today i sat for any hour on my bed w/ a switch blade to my wrist. I am in my early twenties and feel totally useless. I quit my job almost two weeks ago b/c i can hardly stand being in public anymore. I was prescribed to luvox when i was 16, prozac a little while after that, and paxil when i was 20. I never felt any sort of change from the above mentioned medicine. I am broke and have no health insurance but i know i need some help. My boyfriend is a firm believer that people who say they are depressed are really only losers making accuses for not doing anything w/ their lifes. I hate to admit it, but i have begun to believe him. I have lost hope, i have no interests, i am complety lost. I can't talk to my boyfriend about any of this w/out feeling like i am only making accuses. Depression and mental illness run in my family but still, i can't talk to them about this b/c once again, i feel like it is just another accuse. I can remember only one time in my life when i wasn't depressed. It was two years ago. almost every night i would go out to bars. But it was the happiest time of my life!!?

I don't want this to be it. I don't want to give up.

Dr. Joe, do you have any suggestions? I live in indianapolis, in. Do you know of any clinics that would take me on?
Thank you so much for such a wonderful site. It really helps to know that i am not alone.
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Old 09-17-2004, 11:56 AM
overthinker overthinker is offline
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Hi Sharron, I just read your message to Dr. Joe and felt that I had to respond to you if for nothing more then to let you know you are not alone. I am 32 and was in a very similar situation when i was your age. I am still battling depression and the demons of the past. It sounds to me like you need a better support system. I understand your frustration with medication. I am a firm believer that therapy is something that makes a huge difference. I really hope you can find some help through a free clinic or something. I will tell you this though- depression is as real a medical condition as any physical disease or ailment. If your boyfriend is feeding you all of this negative information- he is wrong. You are stronger then you know and the proof of this is that you wrote to Dr. Joe and that you keep trying. Don't be too hard on yourself, life can be hard at times. I hope you feel better.
Take care
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  #3  
Old 09-18-2004, 08:48 AM
Sharron Sharron is offline
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Thanks Overthinker
I really appreciate the response.
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  #4  
Old 09-18-2004, 01:15 PM
Dr. Joe Dr. Joe is offline
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Sharron--
Depression can make you feel so alone, thatís why I think itís wonderful when someone like Overthinker responds with such compassionate, sound advice. People reaching out people is such a powerful tonic.

According to your post, you woke wanting to harness a positive attitude and it didnít take long before you ìslippedî back into your slump. Iíd like for you to recognize that your ìslumpî is as good a word as any for the habit of depression. As you may know from visiting my website, I find it more helpful to view depression as a habit of insecurity, rather than an illness. For starters, habits are learned and habits can be broken. Iím not discounting the fact that depression often runs in families. Sure there are genetic dispositions, but a disposition towards depression, or anxiety, or panic, isnít a life sentence. It is only a tendency towards certain behavior. A tendency can either be embraced and encouraged or rejected and extinguished. Simply but, your depressive-tendency/habit needs you if it's going to survive. Learn to stop feeding it and it will extinguish. When your boyfriend tells you that depression is for losers and that kind of thing, donít let your insecurity cloud your judgment. Donít become part of the problem. Instead, become part of the solution. You are not a loser! You are truly and honestly an okay person. Your personality is being contaminated by this depressive habit, but that doesnít mean thereís anything wrong with you! Would you say that someone who bites their nails, or smokes, or eats too many sweets isnít okay? Of course not. So why say it about you. Once you begin to recognize that depression is a habit driven by insecure thinking, then you can begin to see it for what it isónothing more. I believe Self-Coaching can teach you how to not ìslipî back into your slump. The only reason you slip now is because you are identified with your depression. Once you begin to view it as a habit, you can begin to fight it off much more directly.

Self-Coaching can only begin after youíve established a stable and safe emotional climate. To do this you may need to be evaluated by a mental health professional in order to see if medication is indicated. Just because depression is a habit doesnít mean that your chemistry hasnít become depleted by the corrosive effects of your struggle. Depression is, in fact, a mind body problem. Once you refortify your body, then itís time to stop the process of depletion. But you must first find that place of stability from which to launch your efforts. Iím sure if you contact your local hospital, psychiatric, or psychological association they will have information on free clinics. Take the first step, make that call today. Realize that there clearly is hope and a way out of this despair. And please donít listen to anyone who tells you that you canít be a whole person again.
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