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Old 10-02-2004, 12:02 AM
smoothieq smoothieq is offline
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Default Battling phone resistance

Dr. Joe, I have read your book on self-coaching as well as many other self help books throughout the last year. I had a life coach for 3 months, and since have been trying to coach myself in finding a career that I love. I am currently in educational sales and have a tremendous resistance to making phone calls. I have been battling this resistance for the last four years of my job, and although I eventually want to leave this position, I know I can make some decent money if I just put into practice some basic sales discipline and make the calls. I have read the book The War of art, Following through, etc.. and still can't seem to overcome my fear of making the phone calls. I am fine in person with people, but I just don't know how to confront this resistance once and for all... Any suggestions? Otherwise,, I'm pretty proud of all I've accomplished this year. At 35 and single I've been trying to live my life instead of waiting for things to happen I have taken a vacation to costa rica to learn to surf,and taken it over as a hobby, I have connected more with friends and family and make a habit of meditating on a daily basis and yoga on a weekly basis...It's this phone fear that still has me paralyzed. I can do it one day and then the next the habit of not doing it takes over... I could really use some practical advice as I have the potential to get out of tax debt and build up a savings if I just make the calls!!
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Old 10-02-2004, 02:04 PM
Dr. Joe Dr. Joe is offline
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Thereís only one way to break this phone fearóat the source. You feel you canít handle speaking on the phone, not because you canít, but because insecurity has hypnotized you into believing this. Itís imperative for you to recognize the enormous power of the mindówhat you tell yourself and what you believe. When I was studying hypnosis in graduate school, I remember seeing a training film where a subject was induced into a deep state of hypnosis. While the subject was in this state, the hypnotist told him that he was going to burn his hand with a cigarette. The hypnotist touched the subject's hand with an ice cube. The subject winced, as if actually touched by a cigarette, but what was remarkable was that the spot where the ice cube touched formed a welt! What we tell ourselves and what we believe make all the difference. If you implant a bit of suggestion (self-hypnosis) in your mind and you believe it (I canít handle talking on the phone), you will live that suggestion. Insecurity has managed to implant these suggestions and you have become its unconscious victim. Until now! In The Power of Self-Coaching, I offer specific ways to ìlet goî of congested, insecurity-driven thinking (in your case, the hypnotic suggestion/superstition that you canít handle phone talk). Itís ultimately about relinquishing insecurityís grip and establishing more self trust and confidence. The fact that youíre susceptible to this fear/hesitation, suggests insecurity is dictatingónot you.
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